Friday, July 07, 2006
It's a Dysfunctional BlogIn honor of the late, lamented Dysfunctional Family Circus and the late, lamented It's a Dysfunctional Life, I bring you captions of this photo. Most of them will fail. You will laugh at two of them.
- The Psychic Newsprint slid slowly off the page and onto the toddler's pajamas. Its time had finally come.
- "Miss Halverson! Bring me my lunch time martini, and a fresh diaper! The European markets are about to close and I can't find my binky!"
- As little Timmy looked dejectedly at the classifieds, he realized that he was only qualified to mop the floors in a research lab. I knew I shouldn't have gotten my "degree" at DeVry, he thought.
- My parents had an unorthodox method of potty-training me. They forced me to put down newspapers, took my diapers away, and blasted air-horns at me when I soiled the floor. To this day, I can't open the Wall Street Journal without feeling the urge to poop. -- Dolly, Memoirs
- The warm glow of his skin illuminated the room, even though it was 3:30 in the morning, and he was reading the newspaper aloud while simultaneously translating the articles into Pashtu. "Thel," he said, "I told you we shouldn't adopt a kid from Chernobyl."
Posted by rightshu at 7/07/2006 07:05:00 PM ::